Focus on the Family?

Commenting on Nehemiah's reforms, J. I. Packer :

Thoughtful pastoral leaders, like Nehemiah, always focus on families and family life, for the family is the first and most basic form of human community. Family nurture, for better or for worse, goes deeper into children than any form of nurture from elsewhere, and the biblical ideal is that families should be the composite units out of which each church is built. Godliness is to be modeled in the family, and faith passed on there. Everywhere in today's Western world, and to some extent in urban communities everywhere on the face of the globe, family life is being weakened and undermined by pressure of various sorts, and this is likely to get worse. So the need to work as Nehemiah worked to keep family life strong, godly, and wholesome is great, and all who strategize and minister to spread God's kingdom today and tomorrow must make families and home life a matter of prime concern.

—J. I. Packer, A Passion for Faithfulness: Wisdom from the Book of Nehemiah (Wheaton, Illinois: Crossway, 1995), 194.

Getting a New Testament Vision for Your Marriage

"We must recover the New Testament's vision for marriage as an aspect of discipleship and as a reflection of God's unbreakable faithfulness" (Vanhoozer, Faith Speaking Understanding, 155).

Disciples of Christ and Marital Fidelity

"One of the most important ways disciples act out the reconciliation that is in Christ is by practicing marital fidelity" (Vanhoozer, Faith Speaking Understanding, 154).

My Life for Yours, or Your Life for Mine

With the recent revelations and growing scandal vis-à-vis Planned Barrenhood, Doug Wilson continues to write to keep the troops moving apace. Here's a snippet from his latest foray:

God created the world, and He configured it in such a way that there are only two possible ways for persons to interact. They may follow the example of the Lord Jesus, and say “my life for yours,” or they may walk in the way of Cain, who slew his brother, saying “your life for mine.” Those are the only possible options, and for sinners the former way is closed to us and impossible unless the free grace of God intervenes. But when it intervenes, we are then able honestly (albeit imperfectly) to say “my life for yours."

And a little further on:

Everyone in authority — like kings, or parents — has been placed in a position where they will use their authority in line with their fundamental creed. And remember, that creed is either grounded in the gospel, and is “my life for yours,” or it is grounded in self, and must therefore necessarily be “your life for mine.”

What Is Being in a Covenant of Exclusive Love with God Like?

"The covenant is like a marriage: the blessing is communion, but the condition is faithfulness" (Vanhoozer, Faith Speaking Understanding, 104).

What Is a Covenant?

A covenant is a "relationship involving an oath-bound commitment" (Gentry and Wellum, Kingdom through Covenant, 132).

What Is a Covenant?

"A covenant, in its normal sense, is an elected, as opposed to natural, relationship of obligation under oath" (Hugenberger, Marriage as a Covenant, 11).

The Next Great Heresy

Chesterton back in 1926, speaking with real insight into real states of affairs:

For the next great heresy is going to be simply an attack on morality; and especially on sexual morality. And it is coming, not from a few Socialists surviving from the Fabian Society, but from the living exultant energy of the rich resolved to enjoy themselves at last, with neither Popery nor Puritanism nor Socialism to hold them back . . . The madness of tomorrow is not in Moscow, but much more in Manhattan.

—G.K. Chesterton, "The Next Heresy," in G.K.’s Weekly, June 19, 1926.

HT: Our Transgressive Daisy Chain

Now That's a Good Question

"'I was born gay!' 'Gender is a social construct!' Hmmmm . . . which is it?"

—Doug Wilson, Our Transgressive Daisy Chain

Every Family a Little Church

Edwards:

Every Christian family ought to be as it were a little church, consecrated to Christ, and wholly influenced and governed by his rules. And family education and order are some of the chief of the means of grace. If these fail, all other means are likely to prove ineffectual. If these are duly maintained, all the means of grace will be likely to prosper and be successful.

—Jonathan Edwards, "Farewell Sermon" (vol. 1 in The Works of Jonathan Edwards; ed. Edward Hickman; Edinburgh: The Banner of Truth Trust, 1998), ccvi.

Responding to Criticism in Marriage with Gospel-Grounded Humility

Over at CCEF you'll find good counsel (as usual) from David Powlison on responding to criticism in marriage.

Mi Amor

I love you to the bottom, Emily, mi amor. And I'm so thankful for your sweet love. It's better than the best of wine!

I rejoice this day in our "uncommon union." And I rejoice that over six years ago we wed with this banner over our marriage:

           It's not about me;
           it's not about you.
           It's about the glory of God!

And I'm rejoicing all the more that that banner still stands over our marriage, to your great joy, and to my great joy, and (we pray) to the great joy of the generations!

What Manner of Woman Is This?

The poise and ease with which my wife recently took care of a diaper gone bad (and I mean really bad) is a marvel of creation, almost otherworldly. 

I panicked. She performed. Flawlessly, seamlessly, promptly, as though she'd dealt with this dirty deed ten thousand times before. But I know she hadn’t. And she sang with cheer while going at the whole mess.

And by diaper gone bad, I mean as in defiling a great deal in its wake besides the diaper, leaving one usually delightful and cute little girl soiled and smelly, and toys and bed sheets and crib smeared with the unholy. 

What manner of woman I married is truly beyond mortal reckoning. But I know this: she is to be praised. May God “give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates” (Prov. 31:31). 

Sucking in Godliness at the Breast

Commenting on 2 Tim. 1:5 and the inducements Paul puts before Timothy to urge him to press on in the faith, Calvin says this of Timothy's grandmother Lois and mother Eunice:

"By [them] he was reared in his infancy in such a way that he could suck in godliness along with his mother's milk."

—John Calvin, The Second Epistle of Paul the Apostle to the Corinthians and the Epistles to Timothy, Titus, and Philemon (eds., Torrance, David W., and Torrance, Thomas F; trans. Smail, T. A.; Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1996), 292.

Women Will Be Saved Through Childbearing?

So what's going on in 1 Tim. 2:15? Women "will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control"? Really? Is childbearing being viewed as a means of salvation for women, either their own childbearing somehow, or Mary's bearing of the incarnate Son of God? Or should we understand this another way?

Perhaps at times we've made understanding this text more difficult than it need be. I don't think this text is speaking of childbearing as the means of a woman's salvation at all. I think there's a simpler explanation. So I offer my simple exposition. And, as you'll see, I'm taking "through," not as means, but in a local or spatial or experiential sense. As in, for example, I walked through the snow today to get to the mailbox. The snow wasn't the means by which I got to the mailbox, but I did go through it (in time and space, in experience) to get to the mailbox.

Now, in the immediately preceeding context, Paul has called upon Adam and Eve (1 Tim. 2:13-14) to support his point in v. 12. And by mentioning the woman's being deceived and becoming a transgressor, the fall comes into view. Then comes v. 15, the text that's thought to be difficult. But mention of childbearing out to be understood in the context of the fall, for that's what vv. 13–14 call for. And childbearing in Genesis 3, post-fall, comes with a curse, the curse of pain (Gen. 3:16). Undoubtedly there's thus an allusion to the curse of Genesis 3 in the mentioning of childbearing.

So a woman, as a woman (recall men and women are being distinguished here, and Eve is being pointed out as the one who was deceived first), is reminded of the curse with every child born, either her own, or another's. Yet here in 1 Tim. 2:15, Paul asserts that despite the curse of pain in childbearing (she's passing "through" childbearing)—which pain doesn't go away with her conversion to Christ!—she will be saved, upon the condition that she continues to believe and persists in a life of holiness and love in self-control. That is to say, she will be saved if she contiues to trust Christ in the path of obedience, or with an obedient faith, or a faith that works, even as she continues to experience the pain of Eve's fall into sin—as she passes "through" childbearing.

You Scratch My Back, I'll Scratch Yours

It looks like there was a handout of Gary Chapman's love languages goo at Wheaton College. (I got the e-mailing about it a little over a week ago.) Unfortunately, psychobabble goo goes over well at Wheaton.

Full disclosure. Wheaton College is my alma mater. She's family. That being the case, with real affection for Wheaton and her students, perhaps I'm allowed to say such things about some of my crazy, embarrassing family members. When Wheaton does this, she's like that crazy, oddball family member you love to pieces but whom you must nevertheless acknowledge says and does some downright embarrassing things.

I love the institution and love the student body, and pushing such rubbish makes me cringe. And all this is said, with all due respect, of course, to a venerable institution with many venerable faculty members, under whom I enjoyed the immense privilege of studying holy Scripture.

Em and I confess we've never quite gotten how people of the Book could go for that man-centered stuff. A modicum of biblical and theological literacy enables one to see it for what it is at a glance: man-centered psychobabble nonsense unworthy of the bride of Christ, and unworthy of Christian marriage, which is to reflect the gospel, not our culture's idols of the self.

As counselor Dr. David Powlison says, Chapman's teaching on love languages offers a glorified, sanitized form of "You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours."

So I hope students of Wheaton and of the Word will find it repellent and noxious to their biblical and theological senses. The Word is sufficient for every marriage. We really don't need Chapman. And not only will we do fine without him, but we're likely to reflect the gospel in our marriages far more if we ignore him and heed the Book, and heed biblical preaching on Christian marriage.

If you want a good review of Chapman's teaching on love languages, see chapter 14 of Dr. Powlison's book Seeing with New Eyes, entitled "Love Speaks Many Languages Fluently." The whole book is excellent, but chapter 14 alone is worth the price of the book.

True Biblical Equality and—Then There's Egalitarianism

Doug Wilson on the biblical notion of equality and its modern distortion egalitarianism:

The Christian faith teaches and brings true biblical equality. The Christian faith also rejects egalitarianism, which is a false definition of equality. Christian equality can be described as equity, or even-handedness. Egalitarianism, in contrast, demands sameness, or equality of outcome. These two visions of equality are about as comparable as wet and dry. Think of it in terms of ten teenage boys trying to dunk a basketball: equity means that they all face the same ten-foot standard, and only two of them can do it—equity thus usually means differences in outcome. Egalitariansm wants equality of outcome, and there is only one way to get that—lower the net. Sameness of outcome requires differences in the standards.

—For a Glory and a Covering: A Practical Theology of Marriage (Moscow, ID: Canon Press, 2006), 90.

Like a Hearty Meal for a Hungry Man

A short way back, I posted about a marriage study a group of us have been doing together this summer using Doug Wilson's book For a Glory and a Covering: A Practical Theology of Marriage. And I said that I expected to do some blogging on the book. However, I've not done any yet.

I've not done so mainly because I've just enjoyed taking the book in as one takes in a hearty meal for nourishment. What can I say? I'm finding it to be solid food for edification. And I've not found myself wanting to analyze and reflect much. I'm just eating. I'm being nourished.

But I do want to record a couple choice quotes. And perhaps I'll get into a more analytical mode later.

In the introduction Wilson recalls how "C. S. Lewis once commented that men think that love means not giving trouble to others, while women think that it means taking trouble for others" (xix). Great observation. To our shame, men.

Speaking then to how some women veer toward overachieving, Wilson recalls how "Lewis once described a woman 'who lived for others'—and you could tell who those were by their hunted expression" (xix). And of course we all know someone like this.

Gathering Together to Strengthen Marriages

This summer a group from our home church is getting together six Sunday nights to strengthen our marriages. Like caring for a glorious garden so it's not overrun with weeds, we're going to do a little planting, a little watering, and a little hoeing in community.

We'll be reading through Doug Wilson's For a Glory and a Covering: A Practical Theology of Marriage. I expect to do some blogging on the book along the way. Please feel free, especially if you're involved in the discussions, to interact and comment. If you're blogging on the book, I'll be sure to drop by and see what you're saying.

For those who'll be joining our jolly gatherings this summer (which Em and I are really looking forward to), I'm posting the marriage discussion schedule below. 

One more word about a word above. I say jolly gatherings, because "the joy of the Lord is our strength," and the strength of our marriages. And I say jolly, because I fully anticipate having a lot of fun with friends. 

Summer Reading Schedule for Marriage Discussion

June 10—Introduction and Part I: "Marriage and the Nature of God" 
                 (Chps. 1-5, xi - p. 26)

                 Discussion Focus: chps. 2 & 5

                 * Hosts: The Wencels 

June 24—Part II: "Marriage Is for Men and Women" 
                 (Chps. 6-8, pp. 29-53)

                 Discussion Focus: chps. 7 & 8

                 * Hosts: The Polenders

July 15—Part II: "Marriage Is for Men and Women"
              (Chps. 9-12, pp. 55-86)           
              Discussion Focus: chps. 11 & 12
              * Hosts: The Walters

July 22—Part III: "Marriage Is for Sinners" 
                (Chps. 13-16, pp. 89-108)

                Discussion Focus: chps. 14 & 16

                * Hosts: The Colberts

Aug 12—Part III: "Marriage Is for Sinners" 
                (Chps. 17-19, pp. 109-124)

                Discussion Focus: chps. 17 & 19

                * Hosts: The Wencels

Aug 26—Part IV: "Marriage Is Good" 
                (Chps. 20-23, pp. 127-149)

                Discussion Focus: chps. 21 & 23

                * Hosts: ?

Twelve Lessons Learned on Vacation

Emily and I spent a week in Cozumel, Mexico moving into 2012, and had a wonderful time. Our goals of seeking the Lord and finding refreshment (mind, soul, and body) away from the hurly-burly of suburban life and press were achieved. For that we are deeply grateful. But something unexpected happened. The Lord taught me (I think; time will tell) more than I ever dreamed or hoped he might. And so this post will outline the "twelve lessons learned on vacation." In subsequent posts I hope to expand on the outline and speak to some particulars. These are not in order of importance. However, if I were to state which lessons learned were the weightiest, it’d be lessons 1 to 5. This should come out in later posts. 

1. Don't try to get out of a vacation more than it can give.

2. Don't leave your Christianity behind when you leave home. 

3. The joy of the Lord alone satisfies fully; everything else serves as a mere pointer.

4. The glory of God is the supreme value on vacation, not the self, not modern concerns.

5. This little vapor’s breath of a life is utter vanity and futility apart from the fear of God and the hope of glory. 

6. God intends to carry on his sanctifying, transforming work even when you think you are taking a bit of a break from that hard road ahead.

7. If you do not actively seek to walk by the Spirit, you will fulfill the lusts of the flesh.

8. I’m still a great sinner; and Jesus is still a great Savior.

9. Heads of homes ought to lead with a God-honoring agenda for vacations.

10. Vacations provide ample scope for seeking and seeing the Lord. 

11. Vacations are for pursuing passionately and jealously a deepening of your relationships, not self-centered overindulgence.

12. Vacations provide ample opportunity to improve your understanding of anthropology.